I keep a Google News Alert query set to “News Sentinel” (without hyphen) just to see what shows up about the paper I work at.
A few days ago this classic lede popped up in Gmail from Layla Bohm, a Lodi News-Sentinel (with hyphen) staff writer:

A jazz musician was injured Friday after jumping from a burning motor home driven by a one-time roller skating stripper from Lodi.

Lordy!
Read the whole tale here.
Tags: news | news-sentinel